Hands up parents, who loves Mondays? No, me neither!
Mondays always start with the best intentions. Before you judge, I like to think I have a lot of patience most of the time - I promise. "Please darling, I love you, can you eat your breakfast and go get changed for school?", "do you have everything you need?" "Your snack is on the side in the kitchen - don't forget your homework, is it signed?", I plead.
Sadly this calm never lasts. Without fail, it always ends in fire-breathing stomping up and down screaming to your voice hurts and your tearing your hair out. "Stop watching TV, doing maths or Spanish reading books (eldest), and so on.
Honestly, there are so many excuses, including "I need the toilet", as we're leaving the house. This is usually met by, "You have two minutes to get yourself into school or I'm dragging you down there and you can explain to your teacher why you are late!".
If anyone walked past our house in the morning they would think World War 3 had begun! It wouldn't be so embarrassing, but we basically live opposite the school.
Our mornings should be calm and relaxed. The children should happily skip out the house 10 minutes before the bell with a kiss on the cheek...
Huge well done to parents who live further afield and have to drive to school, please tell me your secrets?
Gone are the pleasantries now. "No, I don't have the library book you've lost", and "I asked you to get it ready YESTERDAY!". "Your snack is still in the kitchen!", after I'd already told them half an hour ago to put it in their darn bag!
You stop, try and breath and remember these are your tiny little humans that you love and adore, but just as this thought comes into your head your hit with, "Mum here's my PE kit to clean, I need a new one for today, where is it?". And "Mum, I can't find my homework, where is it?".
"Two minutes guys", I repeat - two bloody minutes before school.
Can you feel the anger in my house, because I certainly can! Do you know the little exploding Anger dude from the Disney film 'Inside Out' - that's me right now.
Tell me honestly, how after 5 and 3 years can it be that hard to get yourself ready for school? I swear I was never this bad... but I'm pretty sure I've blocked out those times, so who knows?
My Mum isn't around to tell me otherwise, so I'm going to continue thinking I was perfect in every way. Being some kind of A* role model to three boys this is allowed.
By some miracle, we still manage to pull ourselves together and get out the house and to school on time. Surely this must make me some kind of super woman.
You then return home feeling dazed with your three year old in tow, and wonder what on earth happened!? You then realise that your life is Groud Hog day and you have to do this all again tomorrow; and the next day; and the one after that; and probably for the rest of their school lives - gulp! Happy Monday peeps. :-)
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